Tough couple of days

So - Daddy was gone - and Mommy was left home alone with a newly very fussy baby. Argh. I had Grace to help during a bit of the day (which did make a difference) but it was still very tough.

Daddy came home last night at 1:30 am and had an appointment near Denver (read 30 minutes away) at 7:30 am this morning. Not good. At 5 am when Jac was hungry but fighting eating and I couldn't keep my eyes open I woke Daddy up and asked him to feed him. He did and I went to sleep. He thought I had gone to pump. First misunderstanding of the day. This evening I was trying to help Daddy type something while he was trying to feed and comfort Jac and he got irritated with the way I was doing it and semi-snapped at me and I snapped right back. Two strikes. It is almost midnight so hopefully we can avoid a third strike for the day!

Jac is really having a tough time of it right now. It seems that the reflux has gotten worse - he is not spitting up more - but he seems much more uncomfortable. Previously I could always say that he did not cry unless there was a clear reason he was crying and I could find and fairly easily correct the problem. This is no longer true. I spoke with a member of the NAP team and she and I talked about what has been going on. Babies between 3 and 4 months switch from having a reflexive suck to having a voluntary suck - meaning they start to have more of a choice about what they suck on and they have to be good at sucking to coordinate it as they don't have the reflex running the show anymore. I don't think he is having a problem with his coordination as he is not gagging or choking. He is showing us he can make choices though. It seems to me like eating is not fun - because it hurts with the reflux - and he is starting to not want to do it. Not good!!!! Augh! The NAP team member suggested that we sit on the exercise ball and bounce him in an attempt to change his state - and then try to feed him. We can also bounce him standing up but the ball is easier on the legs. Hopefully this to shall pass. We were told repeatedly that the reflux would get worse before it got better and perhaps we are at that worse stage.

Mostly at night - he cries while we are trying to feed him. He is clearly hungry - rooting around - and yet he cries and fights. We have to be supremely patient to get the bottle into his mouth by encouraging him to open his mouth and waiting until he does. All while he is crying.

This is of course not helping with the breast feeding efforts. We went to see a different lactation consultant on Thursday and it didn't go very well. I have to say that by the end of the session I was just happy to be away from her. Most of the people that I have worked with at BCFH have been great - but I did not like her.

We will try some of her suggestions for how to work on breast feeding though. She suggested that we stop using the nipple shield - if he was going to take to it and make progress he probably would have by now. She says he is not too old to learn to breast feed. She told me about the daughter of a LC (lactation consultant) that started successfully breast feeding at nine months! She suggested that we try spending the day in bed together - him laying on me or next to me - and offer him the bare breast every 30 min. to hour when he is awake. Not to push him but to offer it - and stay this way for 24 hours - only getting up to pump and eat and use the restroom. She suggested that I keep him skin to skin the entire time. She also suggested co-bathing.

On another gloomy note he has not gained much weight. On Nov. 30th he was 7 pounds 4 ounces and yesterday (Dec. 6th) he was only 7 pounds 6 ounces. A very small weight gain for 6 days. Augh. We have an appointment with his pediatrician on Monday - we shall see what she says. His feed volumes have not been great though - especially given his previous weight gain - so I am not terribly surprised - but worried.